Assorted Thoughts 51: Humor Delayed By Summer Field Season Edition

• Everything I know about urban planning I learned from SimCity.
• Apparently small children are like orangutans. As soon as you look away they try to disassemble their habitat.
• You call it breaking and entering.  I call it farming XP.  Thanks, video games!
• Given how many people leave sporting events before the end to "beat traffic," I've found the best way to beat traffic is to actually watch the whole thing and leave after the end, because the parking lots are already at least half empty.
• I really need to create a "socially acceptable" playlist for whenever people might walk in on my music.  I'm tired of living in fear every time shuffle is on and a song ends.
• I'm pretty sure Florida is actually an evil wizard's plot to turn me into a sweat golem.
• Support group for those who abuse zombie-creating viruses: Necrotics Anonymous.
• In Florida, the members of the Mosquito Control Board are elected officials who campaign for the position.  I can't decide if that's a triumph of direct democracy or its ultimate failure.
• Seriously, what the hell can they possibly disagree on?  How do you differentiate yourself from the other candidates?