Assorted Thoughts 21: The 50th Overall Post Edition

• Allow me to summarize about 80% of all conversation in online first-person shooter gaming: "What?  Someone is better at this game than me?  Preposterous!  Clearly they are cheating!  What utter balderdash.  Kindly desist in your use of such appalling "hax," sirrah!  Also, I question your sexuality."
• If you ever need to check if someone is a Californian, there's a simple way: tell them that you think In-N-Out Burger, while decent, is nothing exceptional and you don't understand why it seems to be deified.  Non-Californians will nod and say that seems reasonable.  Californians will attempt to rip your spinal column out via your ear and bludgeon you to death with it.
• The Roman emperors used bread and circuses to keep their populace in check.  We've come a long way since then.  All the United States government needs is the circuses.  Thank you, reality television
• I really can't tell whether the most agonizing hours of my life are those I've spent waiting in hospitals or the times when my internet connection has gone on strike.
• Death cactus panda!  Prove me wrong.
• It's been noted that we only really notice how reliant we are on the internet and technology when we lose access to it.  Some people respond by trying to wean themselves off their dependence on the internet.  I respond by trying to wean myself off my dependence on unreliable ISPs.
• Those gigantic RVs that congest all highways are among the worst things ever.  If I ever come into enough money that I can be exempt from criminal prosecution, I intended to make a hobby of hunting them down with antitank missiles.
• Things one probably shouldn't say whilst cuddling, even if provoked: "I WILL MURDER YOU AND ALL YOU HOLD DEAR!"
• My favorite breed of dog is kitten.
• Ever noticed how much a Pokéball resembles the Death Star?
• Coincidence?  I THINK NOT.
• Linn County, Oregon, has big signs along I-5 pronouncing it the "Grass seed capital of the world."  Personally, I think that's about the most depressing possible advertisement for your area.  "Hey look!  The only thing we have to be proud of is a lot of grass.  Hooray!"