Assorted Thoughts 32: I Think This One Is Actually A Pretty Good Post Edition

• I'm pretty sure my ability to drink 48 ounces of Mountain Dew in an hour and a half and remain living counts as a superpower.
• Granted, that superpower might also be known as "Dying of an unprecedented caffeine overdose/diabetes cocktail at age 34," but still.
• Bumper sticker I have seen: "My kid beat up your honor student."  Counter-sticker I'd like to add: "Too bad the honor student grew up to be the public defender."
• There really ought to be a club dancing-themed video game called "Personal Space Invaders."
• My strategy for avoiding awkwardness due to misreading social signals is to simply not read social signals.
• The Republican presidential debates: Alternate reality television shows.
• There has been some speculation by those who care about such things that certain legendary cryptid animals are actually aliens.  In light of this, I suggest renaming the chupacabra to the Chubaccacabra.
• In recent years, the airship has seen a resurgence of interest due to its potential for use as a long-endurance surveillance platform.  I have to wonder if DARPA is really just a big, absurdly well-funded steampunk convention.
• The university credit union has an ATM in the university center that operates off scanning fingerprints for ID.  I think I might start withdrawing money regularly just to experience the future.
• Ticking time bomb, noun: the world's most depressing form of biological warfare, involving a delayed-release capsule full of deer ticks carrying Lyme disease.
• While I'd rather have the NBA playing a season, I think it's an improvement when instead of endless rounds of mindless "analysis" 24/7, the NBA TV channel is forced to show "Teen Wolf."