Guess what field I majored in.
What did the philosophy major say to the science major?
"Would you like fries with that?"
How do you get an English major off your doorstep?
Pay them for the pizza.
What do you call a Women and Gender Studies major without parents?
Homeless.
What's the difference between an anthropology major and a bio major?
About a point of GPA.
What do you call a chemistry/physics double major?
Hardcore.
What do you say to an American Ethnic Studies major?
"Why did you call me a racist for asking how your day was?"
How do you start a conversation with an exercise science major?
Ask them what position they play on the football team.
What's the easiest way to recognize a music major?
The unhealthy pallor of their skin from never emerging into the light of day.
What happens if you uninstall Excel from an econ major's computer?
They change their major to politics.
How do you know you're visiting a chem major's house?
Fume hoods everywhere and compulsively labeled jars.
What's the rarest thing in a psychology department?
A Y chromosome.
How do you start a fight with an English major?
Tell them that The Silmarillion sucked.
How do you make a computer science major try to kill you?
Tell them "I'm a great programmer. I can do HTML."
No rhetoric jokes is why you're wrong?
ReplyDeleteNo rhetoric jokes is why my lungs are still safely inside my chest cavity. You know how the plagues sent by God fucked up Egypt? That's nothing compared to what a single angry rhetoric major can do.
ReplyDeleteNow with bonus joke!
ReplyDeleteHow do you confuse a philosophy major?
Ask them what they're doing after graduation.