Assorted Thoughts 8: A Large Percentage Of These Are Work-Related

• It's remarkable how much better you feel about an unfortunate event when you can sum up with "At least I was wearing pants."

• I've clearly read too many books on forensics when I know the exact case of horrible murder a new book is talking about from their first two sentences of introduction.

• Four or five days without shaving is about as long as I can go before things get too itchy.  Coincidentally, that's about the length of an average boat trip for work.  The sad part is that after about five days' growth, even a razor with lightsabers for blades would get dull in a real hurry.

• I love biscuits.  However, biscuits made of used needles are a bad idea.

• You know how people will sometimes say "There's no wrong answer"?  They're lying.  There will always be a wrong answer.  Genocide is one of them.  You'd be surprised how often open-ended questions result in the promotion of crimes against humanity.

• Nerd prison: where you have to barter sexual favors for Mountain Dew.

• It probably says a lot about how weird I am that I make a game of trying to search for the exact title of the Wikipedia page I'm looking for, so there is absolutely no redirecting involved.  No capitalization, word order, or punctuation changes.

• I feel like the motion sickness tablets may not be doing their job right when I get nauseous just looking at their package.

• A working knowledge of 1337 is surprisingly useful when choosing passwords that are, in fact, good enough for government work.

• Getting tired while doing paperwork at 3 AM?  The answer is to crank up the Dead Kennedys.  Suddenly you are awake.  From personal experience, it seems that holidays in Cambodia mix well with fish weight data.
• After four days at sea, there is no contest: showers are much, much better than sex.